Duane Lee Chapman aka Dog the Bounty Hunter versus the United States FBI and the po po. Yes, I’m referring to the missing Brian Laundrie and the dead Gabby Petito. I’m secretly, actually overtly, rooting for the Dog.
The Dog is a good boy. His hair and duds are always a welcome flashback to the 1980’s.
I understand the Dog isn’t a one-man-show. But, his small team of people might be better suited to the Laundrie hunt than a big old government bureaucracy. The FBI has had some major screw-ups. On top of that, you’ve got numerous government agencies, overlapping jurisdictions, information slipping through the cracks, slow response times and poor policing. All of them badged-up folks and special agent types, at a very critical point, didn’t know that Brian fricking Laundrie was no longer at his house. The dude is gone!? Where was the surveillance? Hello, us Americans watch crime television, ya dipshits.
I was quite excited when I saw the Dog at the Dirty Laundrie’s front door. At which point, Brian Laundrie’s mother called 911 . . . on the Dog!? For what crime? Knocking? Fine! Fine that bitch for wasting resources.
I’m pissed off over the death of Gabby Petito and want that Brian Laundrie found. I don’t care who gets the job done, but I’m gonna put my money on the Dog.
Author of Sex in the Name of God